Dealing with negativity.

I always saw myself as a strong person who handles her emotions well. But everyone rises and falls.

I cried for the first time today because of work. It shocked me to see how vulnerable I had become, to a point where small issues will affect me greatly.

Although I didn't bawl and teared for a mere 5 seconds, my heart still hurts and this might take a while to get over. "How do I move on?", I asked myself. You just pick yourself up and do what you can.

Only consolation I can give myself is that no one is truly perfect. We can all wish to be but there is no measurement to that. All I want is to be happy when I do what I do, that's all that matters. All else is secondary to me.

My diet

Ever since I started work, I began putting on the pounds. It didn't bother me initially until I realised my thigh gap was closing in on me. I did not want all the hard work I had put in over the past 1 1/2 years to be put to waste because laziness was creeping up on me.

So about 2 weeks back, I decided it was time to get back into shape. I had put on about 2-3KG over 5-ish months and that's pretty bad. Only pregnant women put on that much weight. I thought about how I was going to approach my diet since I'm working and it's inevitable to want to snack occasionally.

First rule in my diet was to eat clean. This is important as opposed to just starving yourself. I went to the supermarket and got myself a ton of great organic vegetables as well as fillings for my sandwich (which I have had as lunch consistently since my diet started).

I also ate yogurt for breakfast, even with banana or apples if I was feeling hungrier than usual. Lunch would be sandwich and dinner varies, depending on my hunger level. I've recently been eating this delicious Marks&Spencer Vegetable and Bean Chilli soup that's amazing, hearty and super tasty. I add in a dollop of fresh cream cheese just to thicken it up.

In between, if I do feel like my mouth is itchy, I do get a cracker or two (they're my weakness) and I drink lots of water to flush out toxins.

It's only been two weeks but I've managed to drop 1KG, which really motivates me to keep on going. It's definitely a challenge when your colleagues are indulging in Chicken Rice, Pasta and so on but I did have a break and ended up getting Soba Salad for lunch one day.

I've come to learn that dieting is a relative term and is hugely dependent on how you view it. But for me, being healthy is the most important. I'm generally a non-fussy eater, which makes this regime much easier for me than others.

Will continue to update and see how far along I can get before getting back to my pre-work weight.

Birthday Post!

I turned 24 this week and I don't feel a single bit old. In fact, apart from my expanding waistline, nothing has changed. I had a very mild and cool celebration with 3 meals over 3 days to celebrate my coming of age. Truth be told, I enjoyed the food more than celebrating. The whole idea of being the centre of attention completely throws me off and I'm more than happy to just be part of it.

My very sweet and charming boyfriend took me on an extremely romantic dinner, situated along Purvis Street. I apologise for judging Singapore too quickly because this little island is quite big on fancy cuisines. We had "Modern French" at Gunther's and it was a satisfying food-lovers-dream-come-true experience. I've never had anything quite like it before and I enjoyed every single dish presented.

The bill turned out massive and I feel awfully guilty but I admit, it was so good I would have gone for seconds. My favourite would have to be the super succulent and tender Wagyu Beef (I had many culinary firsts that night) which almost made me cry - for its flavour and the price. I always thought hosts on TV were exaggerating when describing "food melting in your mouth" and I finally shut up when I had my first bite of the beef. I now cannot see food in a subpar light anymore. My new motto - go good or go home.

We ended the night with sweet treats complimentary of the restaurant, which was more than enough to fill my stomach. I'm not usually a big fan of sugary foods but the Macaron I had was amazing. All in all, I enjoyed myself thoroughly and cannot be more grateful for the wonderful gastronomic opportunity. Although the food has long been dissolved, memories stay intact.

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